A Tale of desires

A Tale of desires - English (Translated from Hindi)

At times, the heart says:
Let get swayed in the sounds of music.
And there are times when the heart says,
Let get drown in a silent ocean.

Since all these desires stay just for a few moments,
Can find no moment which ceases crave for another desire,
Nor Can find desire that ceases time for that moment.

In this race to desire and satisfy desires,
Life stopped, as it was also for few moments.

इच्छाओं की कहानी - Hindi (Orignal)

कभी दिल कहता की,
झूम उठे संगीत की आवाजों में |
तो कभी कहता है दिल की,
डूब जाए किसी सागर की खामोशी में |

जैसे हर कोई ख्वाहिश,
रहती है सिर्फ कुछ पलों के लिए,
मिलता ना कोई पल,
जिसमें ना हो कोई दूसरी ख्वाहिश,
ना मिलती कोई ख्वाहिश,
जिसमें थम जाए सारे पल |

यूं ही देखते निभाते ख्वाहिशें,
थम गई सांसे, जो भी थी कुछ पल के लिए !

Book Recommendation – Practical Vedanta Philosophy

I just came across this wonderful book by Swami Vivekananda – Practical Philosophy from Vedanta.. It contains many speeches of him which he gave in different parts of the world and also some direct discourses in the book. What a beautiful expression of Vedanta philosophy. Would love to share the end note which if understood can make this world a beautiful game to play with a free will.

In the midst of the manifold, he who sees that One; in the midst of this infinite death, he who sees that one life; in the midst of the manifold, he who sees that which never changes in his own soul — unto him belongs eternal peace.!

Strong Recommendation to all for this book.


From a young age, we are not only taught ethics, but we are expected to maintain ethical behavior at all times and under all circumstances.

We must not deceive others, we must not envy, we must share our possessions with friends and family, etc. These teachings are etched in our minds as children.

Ethics in education is important because it contributes to the proper functioning of the system. Ethics sets the standards of what is acceptable and what is not, thereby protecting the interest of oneself and society at large.

It’s great if we stick to the all code of ethics. But are the roots of ethics, which gave rise to this code of ethics, true?

What if I say that most of us, even if we follow every good code of ethical conduct, are following most of the time with a false foundation? Well, I was dumbfounded when I realized personally that all these moral science lessons that had been taught to me had been understood with false roots/foundations.

First of all, one need to understand, what are the foundation of these ethics. How did ethics become an integral part of the lives of all?

Ironically, much of our ethics are based on fear and selfishness. Let’s understand this from example.

I should Share”. However in this morality we have been taught, if I expect other people to share with me, then I should also share. There is therefore self-interest.

“I should not injure someone”. What if this person harms me in return. If I hurt someone today, I’ll be hurt tomorrow, too. There is thus fear.

The law of karma has taken the ethical terrain, we sow, we reap. If I deceive others, others also deceive me, so that there is both fear and selfishness. I observe that the ethical code that is most often followed unconsciously, is either from fear and selfishness.

From a global perspective, if we fully understand the fundamental basis of bilateral relations between countries, human relations with the environment, even human relations with the Almighty, are mainly due to fear or selfishness.

The entire code of ethical conduct is part of humanity’s ongoing evolution. It changes from time to time (Sometimes for good reasons and sometimes false).

However, this ethical code is short term and changes with change of fear and selfishness.

Eg:- America had some selfish interest with Pakistan, so it had better relation with Pakistan in past, now it needs India to check China Dominance (Out of fear), so they are having better relation with India.

One may ask, even if this is based on fear or selfishness, what is the problem ? To the extent that it helps the world survive in a better manner, there is no problem. I agree that this code of ethical conduct has assisted this land to survive. Otherwise, there will be nothing but a war or an act to injure someone. However, can we continue to act on ethical principles based on fear and selfishness?

I only realized the flip side of the coin when I found another avenue in the Code of Ethics that is not rooted in fear and selfishness. The basis of love and equality within our ethical mores.

A verse in the Bhagvad Gita gave the answer where the roots of the Code of Ethics can be transformed into Love rather from fear or selfishness.

15.15 Verse: – सर्वस्य चाहं हृदि सन्निविष्टोमत्तः

Super Soul is seated in Hearts of all living beings”. (Super soul is popularly known by the name of God, Lord, etc.). It is without regard to any caste, religion, race or nature.

I should like to share a small portion of Swami Vivekananda’s explanation of this verse.

Since seeing the Lord equally existent everywhere, he injures not self by self, and so goes to the highest goal. This one saying contains in a few words, the Universal way to Salvation. This is the ban of human nature, the curse upon mankind, the root of all the misery is this inequality. This is the source of all bondage, physical, mental and spiritual

– Swami Vivekananda

Our true Self and other true Self are same and integrated. If we regard this fact in our ethical philosophy, then the foundation of our ethics can be modified. One who does not injures Self by Self, does not cheat self by self, one who look at an individual with equal eyes are the required roots of the ethical code. It neither contains selfishness nor fear. It is out of love for this Super Soul which dwells within each of us. Stealing from other people, that’s stealing from me. This foundation of the ethical code is permanent and derives from a profound knowledge of spirituality.

Today, with individuals, countries are also in the rat race to be the most powerful and demonstrate their superiority, however this kind of attitude can loosen an ethical code in the long run because here it is also based on fear and selfishness. Fear because one would be beaten if someone else became powerful, and selfishness to be better than others.

By the very nature of our manifestation, we can only take from this universe and to help others, is just to return back what we already got from this universe. Gita Philosophy is contrary to Socialist Philosophy. Socialists believe that we need to help the poor as one is deficient. But according to Gita’s Philosophy, nobody is deficient in this world. One is just ignorant to not recognize the inner self sufficiency already existed within oneself. If one work with the wrong ethical codes and see other as deficient then one will never see the Self Sufficiency of other in terms of super soul that already resided in him.

In ethical code of Gita, two thought exist.

  1. To remove the ignorance of deficiency of a person and
  2. To not steal him.

Remove ignorance with importing knowledge of self-sufficiency. The concept of self-sufficiency can remove one’s deficiency, permanently. Concept of Self-Sufficiency can be imparted with the knowledge of seeing the real self (Super Soul) in oneself and others. Now here roots of ethics is Devotion.

We all would have heard this quote “to love others we need to first love, our own self”. When this love for the true self, see itself in the heart of all living beings, then the foundation of ethics is realised.

Today in schools there is subject of moral science, where all topic of Western ethical codes are explained. However, if the first knowledge, that we communicate to children, that the true self (Lord, God, etc) resides in all living beings, when this knowledge get imprinted in one’s mind, then base of ethical code can be transformed into love. This process of integrating love and empathy for all living being, when achieved, can lead us to the strong roots of ethics, which is permanent. If we delve deeply into the life of great souls as Mother Teresa, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Swami Vivekananda and others alike, as socially committed as they are, and analyze their ethical base, we would realize it’s out of love and empathy for all.

Ethics has taken a new ground in this world era, however I feel that ground of ethics when backed by fear and selfishness can never be the ethical base itself. This wrong ethical base is deeply rooted in our system (which includes me), however this knowledge of Gita Verse can start the Journey towards for the better world tomorrow, where we can actually see the world as a family in truest Sense.

Are You Religious ?

With the current general definition of being a religious person, I can be considered an atheist (નાસ્તિક). I rarely go to the temple, I don’t even remember the basic mantras like hanuman chalisa, chants, shlokas, I never fast, I strongly oppose outdated religious beliefs and so on.

However, with the experience of studying the Bhagvad Gita and looking at many spiritual and religious perspectives,  it has come to be the opposite case. From the point of view of the Bhagvad Gita, I have found that most people, including me, knowingly or not, are on their way to being religious on different levels.

Still, when someone asks if you’re religious. How should we answer this? And on what grounds should our response be.?

This blog could give a fresh dimension to the above questions.

  • Principles of being religious.

From the point of view of the Bhagvad Gita, the general tenets of being “religious” are as follows.

  1. No arrogance of one self.
  2. Empathy for all (no one superior, no inferior – everyone is equal to you).
  3. Live life in the present moment without expecting results.
  4. To understand one’s inner ability and to keep enhancing that ability.
  5. To understand the creator and it’s creation.
  6. Consistent devotion towards the creator.

The traditional religious path has concentrated mainly on constant devotion to the creator (Point No. 6). However, today I am concentrating on other points, which unfortunately known religious people had often overlooked.

Personally, I believe that if one follows first 5 points, then consistent devotion to the creator will be a natural course of action in his life. However if one start directly on the path of devotion for the creator without following the other religious principle, i.e. nothing but foolishness.

Of all religious principles, the understanding of the Creator and his creation is of the utmost importance. Because if one understands the creator and creation, it would be easy to follow other religious principles.

  • Who is Creator. ?

The creator is the first intelligent author who created this whole Universe.

It may seem that nature created the universe. Following question: Who created nature?

If we examine in greater depth the elements of nature, then the existence of the sun resides in its light, the existence of fire resides in its warmth, the existence of water resides in its fluidity.  If there is no light, heat and fluidity respectively to sunlight, fire and water, then these elements have no existential value.

The Bhagvad Gita – Adhyay 7 describes the creator as an existential value of nature.

Creator has multiple role and it can be understood in infinite number of forms. However the closest and easiest way to understand can be its form of our human body.

In general, our body is nothing more than a collection of atoms. However if we open our body, then we realize that our body is not only accumulation of atoms, but it’s a well-planned and well-co-ordinated body that looks at all aspects of its survival. Then who thought for this coordination ? Can atoms be the thinking machine ? If we ask this question, then we can understand the role of the creator as “creative coordinator” of all the atoms.

However creator role does not end with creation but his role also extends to be the maintainer of the world.

Let’s look at one of the five world elements i.e. Earth, here we can also realize that creator not only coordinate the creation but also maintain the creation.

Earth moves 25,000 miles a day, per hour 1,040 miles. According to science, it is said that if the speed of the earth increases/decreases even slightly, then there may not be any agriculture due to atmospheric changes. So who gives this knowledge to Earth to maintain the velocity of Earth and how?.

Here the role of the creator can be also seen as the maintainer. And without this maintainer, there could be no possible existence of this Universe.

The more questions we ask, the more we realise the presence of this first intelligent author in everything we see, feel, hear, smell and taste.

This first intelligent author is commonly called the Creator/ God/ Aatma/ Soul/ Allah/ Krishna/ Christ or any possible connotation.

I will further use God from all above name for two reasons,

  1. If we understand the commonly known full form of God, then it gives holistic view of God.
    G – Generator (Creator),
    O – Operator (Maintener),
    D – Destroyer (Third role of creator)
  2. “God” being religious neutral name.

After understanding the existence of God everywhere, one may wonder why we are unable to see God then.

Why we are not able to see God. ?

Let’s understand with below example.

Eg:- One man went into the jungle and became thirsty after awhile. He observed that the jungle is so green without rain, that there must surely be a lake or a river nearby. He looked for water all over but he didn’t find a river or lake for the water. Alas, a man of sound mind saw him and called this man home and served him water.

To supplement his curiosity, he asked this sane man how the jungle has so much greenery in spite of the absence of river or lake around. How trees nurture greenery with no water.

The sane man responded that the roots of the tree can use stored ground water to keep them green when there is no rain. But humans have no roots in the ground so they have to dig deep to obtain water. Humans need to understand the right place to find water rather than go with the flow of senses.

The reason we are unable to see/sense/hear/taste God is because we seek God in the wrong place.

What happened in the traditional religious principle that it had limited God’s availability in temples/churches/mosques/sacred places..

From the 7th to the 10thAdhyay in Bhagvad Gita, all forms of God has been explained. In 10thAdhyay which is popularly known as Vibhuti Yog, the author has described, how our human senses can also feel God presence.

If I explain the crux in glance, then God existence is in everything as life energy and his intelligence pervades the maintenance of this world. Every creation we can see, feel, hear, taste and feel in this universe originates from the same creator. And we, as humans, have received the special gift of understanding the role of the creator and creation. God is the essence for the celebration of one’s own creation.  

But there are many who do not find any reason to be driven to understand God. Most people today is engrossed in fighting for better survival in this world. In this process, there is a tendency to forget who their creator is and why behind their own creation. And this is because of the presence of a big cloud between us and God and i.e. Maya.

  • What is biggest Maya in this world ?

When one consider the existence of the world as the permanent truth, then it is biggest Maya.

Maya is delusional. Even though being the part of maya those who remains detached from maya is what religion/spirituality helps us to accomplish.

We should not waste this life remaining entangled in maya of this world as other animal species. And thus religion helps us to escape from this greater maya.

  • Tata Twam Asi

In our Upanishad reference is made to the very intrinsic aspect of our manifestation, i.e. “Tata Tvam Asi”. Tata means Creator, Tvam means You (Creation). This means that you are the creator and the irony is that you are the creation.

In Bhagvad Gita, in 1st to 6thAdhyay, Tvam is Explained (What is you and How is you and How Should be you), from 7th to 12thAdhyay it describes Tata (Who is God, his Presence and his Form description) and from 13th to 18thAdhyay, it is about adjoinment of Tata and Tvam. “Tata Tvam Asi” means when creation adjoin with creator, creation becomes the reflection of creator.

This thus explains to us the final bond between the creator and creation.

  • What religion do for us. ?

Religion is the medium which make us constantly realize that there is someone above us who is all pervasive in this universe. One may consider this form in any possible connotation like Krishna, Ram, Allah, Christ, Buddha, Mahavir, etc,. Religion makes us understand our role as temporary visitors to this world. Then it help one realize that the creator (God) within the creation (Oneself) is permanent. And then it make us further realise one’s current manifestation as impermanent. Finally, religion teaches us that there is the same creator (God) in all creation. This realization of oneself will then bring peace, happiness and love into life forever. To elaborate,

Peace– There is nothing to achieve, as you know, there is nothing to gain from here. Everlasting peace without arrogance and expectation.

Happiness– As this manifestation has been chosen by one for celebration, exploration and dedication, there is just happiness in this role.

Love – Everything you see through your senses is You. If you can love yourself, you can love each creation.

  • સેવાપૂજા Vs પાઠપૂજા

Today most of the perceived “Religious People” have taken the way of “સેવાપૂજા”

સેવા–Altruism, પૂજા – Devotion.

To see altruism as devotion or devote in the form of Altruism. This religious path is very noble, however this path of સેવાપૂજા is often devoid of Knowledge(જ્ઞાન). Here many people have considered the સેવાપૂજા as serving only god in the mode of doing morning puja, going temple, jap mala’s, yagna’s, chanting Shloka’s, participate in religious bhajan’s, doing fasting, etc. I do not have aversion for all this way of serving to god. However, I averse, when it is devoid of knowledge / meaningful reason behind doing this activities.

Here, there is ignorance in understanding the difference between theistic and atheistic.

Being Atheist (નાસ્તિક) can be decided by two characteristics.

  1. One who does not believe that there exists a power beyond himself or nature.
  2. One who does not have knowledge of the creator in full form and cannot differentiate between the creator from nature (False Ego).

Today unfortunately most perceived theist people often goes in to the atheist category, as they have rarely tried to put more thoughts in getting the knowledge of the creator in it’s real form.

In Gujarati Language, to go above the way of સેવાપૂજા, there is another religious way which is more ideal than the former and i.e. “પાઠપૂજા”.

પાઠ – Attain Knowledge,  પૂજા –Devote towards that Knowledge.

First attain knowledge of creator and then devote in varied forms of worship, meditation, karma, altruism, etc.

And beauty of this પાઠપૂજા is that once you attain the knowledge, devotion towards the knowledge and also સેવાપૂજા will automatically be the integral part of life.

  • Worship (ઉપાસના) VS. Devotion (ભક્તિ).

In understanding religion and religious people we also need to understand the difference between Worship (ઉપાસના) and Devotion (ભક્તિ).

When one goes to God after understanding the powerlessness and helplessness of oneself, then he is worshiper of the Creator.

Most people worship God rather devoted to God. And this happens when they fail to understand the role of God in the world and its mode of existence.

Today, people when left with nothing, worship God. However, in this case, one goes to God as a beggar and only requests worldly happiness. We often give more attention to modes of worship, to rules of worship, but we forget the essence of worship.   This often makes us God fearing community. 

There is difference between worship (ઉપાસના) and Devotion (ભક્તિ).

  • Devotion requires acceptance of four major philosophies.
  1. God is the creator of all beings and the all-knowing one.
  2. God created this universe and all the elements in the universe (including us) and it is all pervasive.
  3. No matter what we have in life, it ought to be contentment. (No begging for worldly things – It also brings the concept of gratitude for all that you have in life).
  4. The apathy of his own manifestation. (As one is just visitor – one rather paying more attention to manifestation should be more concerned about its role. Manifestation will die, but role will remain).

Devotion can be attained with certain fundamental human principles like.

  • No greed and envy,
  • No fear,
  • Empathy for all
  • One who has won over anger,
  • One who knows creation and creator,
  • The one who can distinguish between the creator and the creation and also understand the relationship between the creation and the creator.

This basic human principles make one religious and spiritual.

  • Why to Worship God ?

Finally, one may wonder if I obtain all the fundamental human principles and also the knowledge of the creator and creation and understand it’s relation then why I need to worship God.

To understand that, imagine oneself to be the boss of the Company.

Now there are two types of employees in your company.

  1. There is one employee who does all the required hard work wholeheartedly but seldom shows respect or praise to boss.
  2. There is second employee who does not do the work assigned to him wholeheartedly but always keep praising boss.

What type of employee one will prefer for one’s company. ?

One will tend to choose the 1stPerson. As there is no sense of good morning (Praise and respect) if he does not work wholeheartedly. That’s so simple to answer, right?

If this philosophy is so simple for normal humans to understand, imagine God/ Aatma/ Soul/ Krishna/ Ram/ Allah/ Christ/ Nanakji/ Ma Amba who have created this complex world would ever choose the second employee ?

One who go to temple everyday, do lots of fasting, remember all chants and shlokas but does not follow the basic principles of Human, should deserve to be true employee of God ?

Let us then consider the possibility of a third kind of Employee.

This third kind of employee is the one who follows all human principles and also recognizes the grace of God.

This is the third kind of employee that God loves the most. Because here love and respect come in two ways. Because here employee acknowledge the grace of boss as he understood the importance of opportunity provided to him.

Going to any religious places and following religious rituals are the form to pay gratitude to the creator for it’s creation. This wondrous world is meant to be celebrated. And we humans have some special elements in the form of Sense, Mind and Intelligence. With that, we are able to understand the world and make it a better place generation after generation. And all this is only possible with the power of God. And with continued gratitude for the power that God has given us, this will slowly help to attain love for God and the final stage will be union with God.

Nowadays most people go to religious places with an expectation that by showing gratitude, God will give them the worldly happiness required such as money, prestige, wife, children, etc. However that’s not what religious places are meant for. The temple, the mosque, the church, etc., are the places where one can bond with the creator with peace. We offer water, milk, flowers, candles to the god for gratitude rather expectation.

Today many of our generation never goes to the temple because they distrust that it can help them. This distrust because when they look at people who worship God, they see that these people seldom observe the basic human principle. The principle of love for all, happiness in everything and peace in mind.

On both sides, that is a loss for the human race. True religion is somehow lost in between. In no way do I want to disregard the traditional modes of worship, there is a strong science behind this tradition. However, I simply wish that the tradition be followed after having reached the right knowledge and after having understood the real science behind it.

So next time, if somebody asks you, are you religious? You better know the right answer.

Thanks for the read. Your comment, like, critic, share and any acknowledgement will give a boost to improve myself to bring better content in the future. Lots of Love.

Marriage – A Sacred Relations ??

There have been many instances specifically in India where with increase in divorce rates, there has been ongoing criticism about the impatient and intolerant youth who now does not take marriage as sacrosanct relations for Life time.

This criticism led me to think the actual reality about the perceived intolerant Youth (more bending towards divorce) vs. perceived tolerant past Generation (Marriages from 1940 to 1999).

Let’s go to the basics first, it’s necessary to put a thought on why marriage came into existence and its evolution. Well the basic purpose of human being is like any other animal species i.e. to keep their own species alive perpetually. And human species have been religiously doing that.

So the human species, men and women have mated and eventually grew the next generation of same species in this world. However human species are quite different than other species. They have many other requirements apart from basic comforts of food and shelter that included different lifestyle needs. The maintenance of this lifestyle was not practically possible to maintain by a single female with a child(ren).

So then came the concept of Bondage (i.e. Marriage) where men and women first get societal bondage called marriage. Then only they were allowed to mate and plan to have a child. Here responsibility of Child had to be taken care by both Men and Women.

Along with that many societal norms/ rituals were built, where women decided to took responsibility of all household work like cooking, taking care of children, home, etc. and men took responsibility of all outside work like arranging for food, safety, shelter, etc. to give their family a basic lifestyle.

Men were earning bread, they had naturally more muscle power and as they also garnered more knowledge about the world, this made them more powerful then women. Gradually all decision power for more important decisions of family went on the men side. I believe Patriarchal Society was then started and evolved periodically.

This Patriarchal Society was well accepted until early 1970’s in India. Majority of women did not think of household work as non productive or degraded work and were happy with their own responsibility. And those few women who did not accept their responsibilities, lacked Power to revolt against Patriachy.

Slowly as human species started having access to technological and also cultural advancement like education to all, equal rights, telephone, television, internet, smart phones, etc., the power of knowledge also started to reach at almost equal level to both men and women. With access to knowledge naturally came more ambitions for human species. This was more self empowering for women due to their unexplored ways to lead their life.

Even today people from both old and young generation still strongly believe that self empowerment of women has only led to rift in the marriage. However I believe this is nothing but an unfortunate belief that will lead to more disaster in future.

The tradition of Patriarchal Society started thousands of years ago and continue to flourish till around early 1970’s in India. And the pace of women empowerment has just gathered momentum from last 40-50 years. And in these years where women started demanding equal rights as Men, it started a revolt in many men dominated communities.

Most of the rituals made during the old time were very apt, well thought off and highly logical. However in last 40 years where technology, education, knowledge sharing, etc was evolved at fast pace, the patriarchal rituals did not evolve that speedily. This resulted into conflict between men and women. The responsibility given to men and women was not given with the concept of giving power to one. It was given so that Men and Women can have better lifestyle and also can provide better life style to childrens.

Today as dynamics of culture are changing, Indian Society need to get out of Patriarchal Rituals. However it does not mean that men and women should change their responsibility. There are certain roles which are out of control of husband and wife E.g: The child birth can only be done by a women (Wife).

However there are things that are in hand of husband and wife. Those things are required to be discussed among themselves to create better life for them and Children’s. E.g.: “Parenting Roles, Financial Roles, Household Roles, Societal Roles, etc.,

I believe Marriage is the one beautiful social norm made in the society and would personally love to see this grow. However we need to assure that there is complete freedom of expression between Husband and Wife.

Well the perceived intolerant youth is definitely still prevalent in both Husband and Wife. A Husband’s attitude to not let go the power of dominance, is an unfortunate Indian culture E.g: “Men can go away with extra marital affair but women becomes impure” or “Men can shout or abuse or control their wife or Men belief that women are only made to do the Household work, etc.”.

Also perceived intolerant youth in Wife who wants to sometime snatch the power for so called feminism and not because of self empowerment or the common life goals E.g.:- “Wife going to work just for the sake of their right as Women even if it imbalance their entire Home environment and children development”.

If divorce are happening because there is no common life goals or there is no freedom of expression between the partner, divorces are also good. However Divorce, if happening for so called misled power snatching from each other creating conflict, than it is dangerous precedent for Human Kind.

Marriage needs to be part of satisfying some common basic minimum requirement of both the Partners. Marriage is not a burden of responsibility it is tool of support for better life.

It may then raise a question what one should look while searching their life partner. ?? And I think only three basic things.

  1. Goals of Life:- It’s very necessary to understand what others partner actually want in their Life. This need to be looked holistically without any prejudged biased feed. And if couple are able to relate to each other priority goals even though different then 50% compatibility is achieved.
  2. Sexually compatible:- This Point is often less prioritize because of Indian conservative nature to openly discuss about sexual compatibility. but I seriously think this needs to be actually seen before choosing a life partner. I have observed sexually active couple usually have better understanding between them. It is very important for couple to discuss their sexual choices freely.
  3. Psychological Wavelength:- Sometimes everything is good but couple finds difficult to cop with each other as their psychological wavelength are way too different. It’s the same way that we have very few best friends out of thousand people we meet. They are those who understand us and also whom we can discuss our thoughts freely. It’s necessary that your partner is that best friend.

Above three points will mostly suffice basic things to look at life partner. However it will only work if both partner will always seek to enhance their partner life in tandem with their own life.

Marriage should be honored with the practice of giving better life experience to each other. A Marriage, where no one is giving or taking each other rights, where both are equals, where women home maker as well as men home maker are both equally accepted. This definitely can make marriage sacrosanct. There is no wrong or right in any relationship as each relations are different. All relations cannot be compared to each other as each partnership had been done with one unique combination.

In marriages, other important aspect is childrens and Divorce/Rift after having children. This situation is very disturbing and create a wrong impact on children. Husband and Wife need to realize that there compatibility matters the most when they plan a child. Children till tender age look the world with mostly parents eyes. And if situation arises where disputes are increasing after that investment of a child, one need to try to have common minimum program till children crosses a tender age ( just like our Indian political parties – when no party has majority after elections and two conflicting party get together for development of their citizens and wait till next elections to fall apart. )

So to end, I firmly believe that today’s youth surely take marriage as sacrosanct as their elders only. No couple enters marriage with a goal of Divorce. However youth also needs to understand that there is very fast pace of Cultural and technological advancement. It is very important that with this fast changing tide they need to hold hands more tighter and work towards betterment of each other life and be a inspiration for Generations to come.

As we have started upbringing our daughters with a goal that would help her balance work and home life in future however most parents forget to up-bring their sons to also balance their work and home life in tandem to upbringing of our girls. As “Beti padhao (Educate Girls)” campaign is on run a campaign “bete ko ghar ka kaam sikhao (Teach Household work to Boys)” should also run side by side for better marriage future of our country.:-)

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Avoidable Good Things and Irresistible Bad Things

Certain times I wonder why most bad things are too good to resist and most good things are too bad to avoid.🙄🤔.

This Subject has been in my mind since long but I prolonged to ponder my thoughts on this and get it sorted. However today came the point where it started annoying me🙄. And here I came to write on this weird but the possible fact point in Human Psychology.

Below few examples are some common experience that many of us might have came accross.

  1. Most Yummy Foods contains too Much Fat / Cholesterol.
  2. Most Healthy Foods are too dull to eat.
  3. All Natural Herbs that is too good for health are so much bitter.
  4. Most man made sweets/namkins that are too bad for health are too tasty.
  5. Adding fat belly is so easy and getting in shape is too tough.
  6. Short temperament, jealousy, cynicism, easy money shortcuts, breach of commitments are routine affairs.
  7. Hard work, helping hands, optimism, genuineness are now rare affairs.
  8. Humans easily spend so much money to get addicted to smoking, alcohol, pan masala which are bad for health.
  9. Its getting tough for humans to get addicted to meditation which is good for mental health and absolutely free of cost.
  10. Waking Up at 4:00 Am is good, however sleeping at 1:00 Am is convenient.

This list can go on with Many such things but my only quest is WHY. ?

Does bad things are made irresistible for a reason. ? Does our life goal is to only pass all above litmus test where we have to struggle for good things. ? WHY Avoidable Good Things and Irresistible Bad Things ?

It was now time to try get real deeper in this topic. First thing I thought was to find Major root cause of bad things. And I realised that bad things are usually Exciting (E.g.:- Alcohol, Prostitution, Unhealthy Food, Etc. ), Convenient (Eg. Laziness, Easily Accessible, cheating, etc) and sympathizing (E.g. People usually try to Sympathize it). In short Bad things usually are full of Sense Enjoyment.

However if we look at effects of the Bad things then i.e. Short-lived, Ambiguous, Regressive, Lack of Self Respect, with/without bad ego and lastly pessimism.

Negative long term effects after the attractive causes of Bad things was scintillating to look forward to this topic. After all there needs to be super hero to kill the strong villain to make the successful picture. In our case that altruistic hero is good Things.

Even though this helped to understand Bad things better but it did not lead to the answer of my Question WHY ?

Most of us know above effects and causes. Many of them are well experimented and known to the Human Species, E.g. Staying fit, leaving bad Habits / Addiction are proven good things for well being for any human being. Then why still most of human being (Including me) are not able to seamlessly execute good things.?

But Why do we Fear ??

Thinking more on it I found one factor that can be the major cause that leads to irresistible bad things  i.e. “Fear of Failure / Fear of being to true to oneself” . Fear is the one of the best tools used in a worst way in human psychology.

Well I always believed roots of the most Fears is Generally Lack of Trust / Confidence in one own self. Here can be some few common examples of daily acquaintances of fear / lack of trust.

  • Fear of Society:- Negative repurcurssions not tandem to general Situation (Eg. Corruption in India) even though one is Right ?. That fear / lack of trust to stand for the right is major cause.
  • Lack of Genuinity:- This is more prevelant in the Society. Getting Bankrupt, Breaching commitment, Frauds are day to day encounter. The people who do not trust their ability only resort to such short sighted acts.
  • Fear of Seclusion.:-  (E.g. When I was kid, there was time I really wanted to improve my vocal english, so to do that, I thought to communicate in english with as many peers as possible. But when I did in my school with my friends, I was termed braggart (Bahut Style Marne Laga hain English Bolke). I was secluded in my Journey of Learning.)
  • Lack of Action:- I many times observe people not attempting only due to lack of trust. (E.g. I cannot be next Bill Gates, Steve jobs, Warren Buffet, Sachin Tendulkar or Healthy Person etc. And we accept ourself as normal common man and this irressistable bad things become very much part of our Life.)

Lack of Trust within one own self hinders choosing good things even though backed by its logical benefits.

Rightfully, I can be healthy only by trusting my ability and those yummy unhealthy foods will be avoidable. Those natural herbs would become irresistible because I know it’s the key to my Good Health. Sleeping Early would become a Normal Good habit to get that extra peace of mind in early morning. Recklessness would be more constrained. Bad habits / addiction will also be constrained if you trust you can be more peaceful / happy if you have healthy life. In Short, once there is trust within one own self, strong determination, hard work, concentrated work will come Handy.

However Lack of trust is not only villain in this story. There are some other missing Joints.  Below two Real different examples of my own Life will help us understand more.

Example. No 1:- “I started meditation before few months and continuing till date without any break because it is now irresistible part to spend time with my own inner self.”

Example No 2:- “I stopped my Physical Health Yoga after 45 days successful activities. In that 45 days I actually felt healthier, got complimented with enhanced trust among my friends and relatives.  They shared my Health story as an inspiration to others. But then also I stopped !!!. “

And this whole blog was to find the answer of above Example itself. Why I Stopped. ?

Well definitely it was not only Lack of Trust within my own self. Because I trusted that I could have done it. And I still trust myself that I can do it (First stage Passed).

What I realized that back of my mind I found there is no emergency for me to get healthier. My health except little extra fat Belly is actually fine / tolerable.. I just thought that I can still delay it but I definitely would do this in future.

Its general state of mind  when we elongate some things with some commonly found excuse as “When time of emergency will come I will do it.” or “right now I have other priorities or I have situation to handle, after handling this I would do it “

So other major mental Virus that leads to avoidable good things is none other than we living life in past and future. Most of Indians must have studied this kabir doha, “काल करे सो आज कर, आज करे सो अब । पल में प्रलय होएगी,बहुरि करेगा कब ॥” (Meaning:- Do all jobs of tomorrow today and all jobs of today need to be done now. If life ends in next moment when will you do your work. )

Ironically second thing which came after Lack of Trust was our foolish trust itself that we going to live the life very next moment.🤣.  

Relax, I am not gonna preach now to live life at present as everyone has to introspect this universal accepted thought and accommodate at their own level. So lets end with this thought itself.

Lastly I am seriously laughing at this juncture because I never really imagined the End when I actually started writing this Blog. I actually know that Goods Things can be more irresistible and bad things more avoidable. Its just a different state of our Mind. My Blog may or may not be probably helpful to others but it’s actually helping me.

And yes Your comment on this blog (Positive / Negative), your act of sharing this Blog and your one click likes will boost my outer layer trust even More😁 .

Life – Just a Dream

After long time was just Sitting Idle thinking about life (Which is Rare in My Case😂), I thought lets just express my thoughts to the world this time. And the running thought was – “what if our Real Life was just a Big Dream in Reality” – A dream that Starts with our Birth and Ends with our Death.

Just imagining Life as a dream I saw my life in a most perfect Spiritual trance. The thought of No strings attached came with a spirit of So Much excitement.. Woooaahh… I saw my life where there was no stress of Learning, Achievements, Survival, growth, failure and most importantly there was no fear of Death. As in this case death is only the moment where real dreamer actually wakes up, In short there is no death at all as in dream there is no actual life.

Also as we have no control over our small dreams (thats why many have weirdest Dreams😨), we are also in same way are free birds where the real Dreamer has no control over us. (except till he doesn’t Wake-up to end that dream).

Infact We have the option to give the Best, Worst, Weirdest, Simple, horrifying, etc., Dreams to the actual dreamer. Its all on us.. And I think as most of us actually never remember our dreams. The real dreamer for which our life is a dream may not also remember most of the things any of the time. This thought itself is just so exciting.😉.

After our so called illusional Dream life ends, everything in body and mind also ends in just split of a second leaving no evidence of existense behind. All relations, bonding, happiness, sadness, ego, aspirations, money etc. vanishes as if it never existed. All just end when dream ends.

Adding to this Point further, if we see our world as an outsider, our world also seems nothing but a dream. Imagining a Planet Earth which contains millions of living varied species and our beautiful mother nature helping survive this millions of species with its so beautifully planned eco systems. And not forgetting extra bonus to we Humans in this Earth. It has also given immense scope to Human to further enhance the world with technology and creating another wonders. The way the Mobiles, GPS, Uber, Swiggy, Amazon is working at present was a dream in a dream to our very fathers and creating a home in Mars and Moon is a dream in a dream itself to us. Creating a Reality in a dream is again one wonderful experience as there is nothing to loose if we fail but can get hell lot of wonderful dream experience if we succeed.

And whats more interesting in this dream that Earth is just one minuscule Planet in the Cosmos. Sometimes I wonder is it possible to create this entire cosmos by one master mind which we usually refer as GOD.??? Logically It really seem that its a Dream world of our imagination and not actual creation. Because to built such a magnanimous cosmos which contains innumerable objects like planets, sun, moons, stars, etc that are bonded with each other so meticulously, well I do not think, one actually can..

Yes I can still imagine one power that can make the billions of energy to dream themselves in same World together and start building on that dream world by themselves. In Short we are just part of that billion energy who is imagining ourself together in this Planet called Earth.

However real answer to this would be realized only after our this Dream Ends.

Also As we see the Dream World of atleast human species in whole, I can actually relate it to small dreams that we have. Logically our small dreams when we sleep are mostly illogical.🙄. And actually in Big dreams also most of us have already created a Big Fuss.. There is so much panic, stress, aspirations, expectation, etc. which most of the time is needless. Most of us are running mindlessly without thinking purpose of Existense.

And finally to conclude this wierd thinking, I franky realised that we just need to live at present, and start making this dream beautiful (in one own’s imagination) and yes most importantly have no fear as we are nothing but just a Dream. ☺

I was so in double mind today that whether to start my first blog expressing such weird thoughts to the open world, but than I thought that what difference will it make (Ki farak padega), I am just a dream with no strings attached. 😀 .